Politics

Easter bunnies, gay parade and hot gospel singers


People think Shwashwi is found at parties only. Let me tell you something, Shwashwi is all over, from a brothel to a church. Last week I braved the heavy storms and took a road trip to receive some anointing at Carnival City to watch the much-anticipated Joyous Celebration concert. Yes, the much-loved group is back with a bang.

I spotted former Hawks general Shadrack Sibiya hiding behind a mask and looking uncomfortable. Perhaps he was investigating some of the tenders. Back to gossip!

Upon arrival I was confused by the Easter bunnies and what seemed like the gay pride march into the venue, not to mention the different generations of families that came out dressed to the nines, hai shem. Joyous you are, all-inclusive. I almost forgot to mention the few gay white folks from Brakpan, who are still stuck in the 80s.

All hell broke loose, or in this case, was it the Holy Spirit, when the choir hit the stage. It was as if a spell had been cast across the crowd, and I am starting to think the founders might have some voodoo. People love this group so much that they even cried.

While I was scanning the arena for familiar faces, everybody was shaking their stuff towards the stage to be noticed by the hot members of the choir. I don’t blame the overly eager crowd; there was some serious eye candy on display. I am shocked there are groupies in gospel circles, too.

Speaking of hotness, my holy hunk Sbu Noah is still hot, though he has picked up a few kilos.

Sbu Noah

Fellow soloist Sylvester Funani must please hit the gym. Joyous can’t afford to buy extra fabric as there are too many of you already.

Sylverster Funani

The show came to a standstill when petite MTN GM Nomsa Mazibuko and the beautiful Ntokozo Mbambo announced the three new cast members, Bello Mpendulo, Anele Mxakaza, and Sinelungelo Memela, who were chosen in online auditions a few months before the concert.

While some were captured by the Holy Spirit, my gossip spirit spotted radio personality and activist Criselda Dudumashe… ag, I mean Kananda, who was deep in the Spirit. The devil in me could not help but wonder if she was also praying for a good hubby to come around, phela she is too hot to be single.

Criselda Kananda

Still on divorcees, I also spotted Mohale Motaung and his friends worshipping and praying, probably for a better divorce settlement. Friends who party together also pray together, magenge.

Mohale Motaung

As usual, the styling was on point but this year some outfits left me with mixed feelings. Some of the songbirds looked like slave extras in the Kunta Kente movie. I spotted some choir members tucking in their clothes. Do better measurements next time!

Lindelani Mkhize kept on sweating on stage, not sure if it’s age or whether the Holy Spirit was doing its work.

Dr. Lindelani Mkhize

There is something sexy about Jabu Hlongwane. That Raymond Zondo voice suits him.

Where was Mthunzi Namba? Is he still part of the family?

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